Have you ever been in a relationship trap? Perhaps you’re in one now. You know the situation: you’re in a relationship someone that you know deep down is not right for you. For some reason, though, you stay with it, despite the warning signs. Some of the warning signs you see might be his working excessive overtime or spending too much time at the office, her being vague about where she’s been or will be, his or her dependence on alcohol or drugs, his asking you for money, her lack of boundaries with her family, his siding the with guys over you, her blaming everyone but herself for her problems, and his being threatened by your other relationships.
People who fall into relationship traps frequently acknowledge afterward that there were warning signs, but they overlooked them. We do this for many reasons. We may want to be in a relationship so badly, we refuse to see the signs that this one is not working. We may be enamored with some aspect of the other person, such as how we feel in his presence or the way she praises us. The individual may have something we feel we need, such as a large bank account or stable family. It might simply be because staying with the person is easier than starting over.
If you’ve find yourself relating to these scenarios, I highly recommend Marilyn Frazer’s book, The Relationship Trap. In it she tells the stories of fourteen women who ignored the signs that their partners weren’t right for them. It’s a great resource for someone who is inexperienced, hasn’t dated in years, or has been caught in more than one relationship trap. I wholeheartedly agree with Marilyn’s advice: go in with your eyes open and trust your intuition.