I was asked recently what my bigger-than-I-could-ever-imagine-happening dream is. I’m happy to say that I was able to answer immediately: I’d like to see the safe sex campaign updated for the new millennium and replaced with a sane sex movement.
For decades, the government and health officials have been encouraging people to practice safe sex. This means only having sex with the protection of a condom, unless we know for certain that we and our partner are disease-free. Safe sex is a good thing, because it protects us physically, but I’d like to see us raise the bar and promote sane sex, which is more likely to safeguard us emotionally as well. This is a big dream, not just because it involves my book and spreading my message on a large scale, but also because we haven’t done all that well with safe sex. When I wrote my book, the most recent studies reported that about twenty percent of college-age adults failed to engage in safe sex with the percentage increasing to well over 60% for Baby Boomers. I was alarmed to learn recently that a 2010 study conducted by Indiana University found that over 50% of college students and about 90% of people over age 45 said they had not used a condom during their past ten experiences! (http://www.nationalsexstudy.indiana.edu/)
Researchers suggest that the nascent surge in online dating and use of sexual performance drugs has increased sexual activity among single adults. Combine these trends with failure to use condoms and it’s easy to understand why the incidence of STDs continues to rise. I think now is a perfect time to promote sane sex. Why couldn’t the major online dating sites, which publish tips for successful dating, also promulgate the notion of committing to sane sex?
I can see it now: bumper stickers, buttons and screen savers declaring: I practice sane sex. How about you?