I often write and speak about the many reasons why it’s good to receive. One of the most important is that when we receive, we simultaneously give. Yes, that’s right. What we give is the opportunity for the giver to give. This is not a trivial point, because giving is filled with rewards, and when we won’t receive, no giving can take place.
I’ve interviewed many professional caregivers over the past few months. One of the questions I like to ask them is to describe for me a difficult client. Often they tell me it’s the person who resists their care. Unfortunately it’s not uncommon for seniors to refuse to accept the fact that they need help. This failure to receive is demoralizing for the caregiver. It also impacts the senior’s family members, usually their adult children, who are left with both concern over their welfare and the task of keeping their parents safe.
Our failure to receive graciously often affects others. I recall a date I had years ago. My date and I were at a club with several of his friends. When the server brought the check, my date and one of his friends argued over who would pay the tab, both of them insisting on footing the bill. Generally, offering to pay is a kind act, but this went to extremes, with neither one willing to allow the other to give. Those of us at the table became quite uncomfortable, and the unfortunate server was caught in the middle, prevented from moving on to serve others and puzzled who should receive the bill. Sadly neither man realized that allowing the other one to give would have been an act of generosity.
If you’re reading my column, I know you know how good it feels to give! Share that experience with others by learning to receive with grace and ease. We’ll all be blessed as a result.